my literature account

heh yeah haven't been on... sorry about that
i'm really... rethinking posting this story. it was weird just posting the first few parts and was iffy very much on the last one. and its just going to get more personal and... detailed about stuff that i'm deciding i'd just rather people didn't know about
yet at the same time, i've already posted this far so why not? and if i decide to stop should i take down the ones i've already posted?

i don't know...

still doing art but as usual its very slow going due to lack of time


"her story"
part 1 [link]
part 2 [link]
part 3 [link]

my literature account

finally posted the next part after much deliberation. please be... tactful if you leave a comment. this is very touchy for me

started posting the story on my sister on my literature account. going to stick up the parts one at a time instead of all at once so as to not spam

the first chapter isn't bad at all but just as a fair warning, yes it had a decent amount of abuse, cursing, and other things like that

changed all the names. makes it kinda weird to me. meh

part 1 [link]
part 2 [link]
part 3 [link]

my literature account

yes yes that's what i ended up calling my dad last time he called. mature, no? except i didn't use 'frick'. i'm sure you can guess what i used in its stead so there's no need to say it

if you can't, you're too sheltered to hear it anyway

i tried talking to him but my typical uncontrollable rage took over as usual and i ended up ripping the phone from the wall then throwing it back at the wall. needless to say there is a nice dent in the spackle and we're stuck to only using our cells for communication. the good news of it all is that he can't get a hold of me now. i don't think he knows my cell number

i'm very okay with this

in other news, i'll be posting that story on my literature account soon. going to change names and whatnot. i found out that when i change the names, reading it isn't so weird

seriously, you guys should try it. take something that happened to you and try writing it in the third person. turning yourself into the character instead of just writing like its narrative. it feels really weird

i dunno, i think so. maybe its just my crazy speaking

oh, and i've become ridiculously obsessed with warcraft. with nothing much else to do all day but clean, cook, doodle, and browse the internet, that stupid game has started to take up a lot of that extra time. its kinda nice to have something to focus on but at the same time it drives karina crazy. she says i'm like a couch zombie heh

so that's it for now i guess

oh, and remember wherever you go, always... ALWAYS... watch out for johnny the tackling alzhiemer's patient

my literature account

okay, two points that i need anyone's advice on seeing as i'm really stuck here

1. i've already talked with my wife and ersska on this but i've figured that it wouldn't hurt to get a wider range of opinions. my dad has been calling me a lot lately, trying to tell me he wants to make up for all the pain he's caused me. says he wants to do this because he had lung cancer and doesn't want to die this horrible person that he's let himself slip into being
personally, i think he can go burn in hell. i don't care about his feelings (or believe he has any) nor do i believe this crap about him having cancer. last time he said he wanted to make things up to me, it ended in him suing me
but i've been told that i should forgive him even though i don't have to necessarily trust him. i find that pretty impossible considering what he's done but the general feeling is that i should shove away what kind of torment he's caused me and my sisters and let him feel forgiven

2. i've written a story. a very personal story. its basically what happened to my sister, sora, but put down in third person form. i thought maybe doing that would help me come to peace with the whole thing. it helped a little but also made me relive a lot of the horror of it
it also boosted my need to show people the horror of child abuse
for this reason, i want to post it on deviantART. but i'm also afraid to do this. i don't want to be attacked or called a liar from people who don't want to believe it or think my writing style is crap
true, i can't remember every little detail so i make up some words and other things to fill the gaps so its not entirely factual but the gist of the whole thing is correct
but should i post it? or is it something too personal to put out on the internet? would people even care?

any help would be greatly appreciated

i have this song i've been trying to write for a while now but i can't get the lines to work right. nor can i figure out one more verse

crit this please. i want serious scrutiny of this. if you have any way to make the words fit better or ideas of lines or something. anything. i want to get this done

chorus:
I’m sure the other me is crazy
Because I know that I am sane
We are each a different person
Yet we both live in my brain
And every time he comes around
I turn into something that I hate
I’m crying out in desperation
But fearing help will come too late

verses:
The love and care inside me is hidden
By the fury on my face
One moment mad, another sad
Once one is gone another takes its place

I’m holding myself hostage
Though I struggle all I can
Its so hard to fight the opposition
When you and your enemy are the same man